I was a troublemaker in primary school and got disciplined a lot for it -kneeling,
detention, manual labour, lashes, you
name them. So when it comes to punishment, I am a well experienced guy, but the
single greatest punishment I have ever received was on the day I made the
mistake of going clothes shopping for my
girlfriends and mum.
You see, I went alone with energy and confidence and it felt kind of good to
walk through the accessories section and discover how cheap the
chains and earrings were. No wonder ladies buy lots of them. But when I glanced
at the time and saw that three hours had passed and I was still in the shop
not knowing what to buy, or if to buy in
the first place, frustration set in, hunger topped it, tiredness wrapped it and
my confidence vanished! That is where my day took a turn for the worse!
The first action I took was a wrong move. This lady next to me was checking
out similar clothes. So without thinking
twice I blurted out something like this... 'Hi, you look like my mother....what
size do you wear, I'm trying to pick a dress for her'. My foolish self thought
she smiled and tried to be helpful, but now I'm wiser and I know she only heard
the first part of the sentence. '' you look like my mother' . Well, that sentence
is the most powerful way to completely damage the confidence of a 19 year old!
Next, I decided to take a closer look at a row of trendy cute blouses. Actually, a
row of cute blouses invited me to come closer. I obliged and went straight to
the middle row and started feeling the fabric. I was lost in the feeling until
I raised my head and found myself in the middle of a circle of 50 year old
women wearing only brassieres - they were trying the dresses on and had their
backs to me but when I raised my head, they all turned at the same time and
started moving towards me from all sides... My heart stopped beating. They
headed straight for me, one by one they got in front of me and bent over.
It was to pick their dresses and scurry off (I was practically standing on
the clothes they took off to try the dresses). I think one of them gave your boy a wink and a
friendly tug on the arm. No, I didn’t take her number!
I was so embarrassed, I nearly peed on myself. As soon as they were gone, I
rushed straight to a washroom, spotted an empty cubicle and opened my zip. Just
then the cubicle door opened. Just imagine this, an old woman gets out of a
female toilet cubicle in an empty washroom and meets a fit and athletic looking
man with his zip opened and clutching his you-know-what! She didn’t scream or call the police, but the speed with which she vanished
probably hurt me more than spending a month in jail for sexual harassment.
I can't remember how i got home that evening, but before I slept that
night, I swore thunder, fire, brimstone and any combination of the three never
to go shopping for ladies again.From this experience, I
have developed the 10 commandments of shopping for a lady, what do you think
some of the rules are? Like us on Facebook
and leave a comment!
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